Narcissism and the Ugly Side of Vanity

Question: I have a friend who constantly talks about herself and rarely asks any questions about my life. She is constantly preening, obsessed with her body, brags about her sexual and professional conquests, and posts seductive selfies on social media. Is it just self-confidence, or narcissism?

Lately, the media has been examining narcissism from more angles than an egomaniac gazing at herself in the mirror. Reportedly, narcissists have more sex, are nightmares to divorce, feed on self-promotional platforms like Facebook and Instagram, and are growing in numbers. One study even likened narcissism to a modern-day epidemic because they procreate at statistically higher rates.

“Narcissist” has also become the latest slur many people use to discredit their bosses, former romantic partners, siblings and politicians — virtually anyone who makes their life miserable, as egotists often do. Read more…

http://www.metro.us/lifestyle/narcissism-and-the-ugly-side-of-vanity/tmWniv—90bcJlSi6da5s/

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Psychotherapist and freelance journalist Kim Schneiderman utilizes research-based methods to help people who are stuck – in a dead-end job, relationship, of life stage – imagine themselves as the star of their own stories with the power to reclaim their personal narratives. Drawing on the elements of a story that many of us learned in high school (premise, scene, plot, conflict, climax, resolution), readers will assign titles to different chapters of their lives, observe recurring themes, identify supporting characters, and explore how conflict creates opportunities for personal growth that can lead to a meaningful resolution. They will also be asked to examine how the decisions we make, both big and small, affect our storyline – the relationships we choose, how we spend our day, and how we nourish ourselves, physically, mentally, emotionally, and spiritually.

Unlike most self-help writing workbooks, most of the exercises in Step Out of Your Story are framed in the third-person voice, freeing readers to see beyond their usual point of view. Psychological research suggests that people are more likely to view their lives favorably when they see themselves as characters in a story. In a 2005 Columbia University study reported in the Journal of Psychological Science, test subjects who spoke about difficult chapters in their lives in the third person narrative displayed more confidence and optimism than those who recalled bad memories in the first person. By retracing their steps from the perch of the third-person narrative, people were more likely to regard their problems as something outside themselves – challenges they had conquered or adversaries they had defeated - instead of character flaws. Additionally, the perception that they had overcome obstacles left them feeling more confident to face the future.